The Story Behind If They Can't Kiss Right: Surviving Online Dating
By Shannon Yingst
After I broke up with a long-distance boyfriend, I felt both
like trash but also like it was my time to shine. Nice shiny trash out for her
first time in a long time with the knowledge that men did want her. That
very quickly devolved into one odd date into another. My friends heard every
single story and even came to pick me up from a disaster date or two. They kept
telling me, “Shannon, you have to write a book. This is gold!”
I was coming to the end of my graduate school time, and they
announced our thesis guidelines. If you were writing fiction or non-fiction,
the only guideline was page length. I thought for awhile on topics and
flip-flopped between a lot of ideas. None seemed like they were good enough. I
started writing this idea and really loved where it was going and how it felt when
writing. My advisor loved the idea and encouraged me to submit it as my thesis.
It was approved and eventually became the first draft of my book.
A couple months after graduating, I joined an alumni group on Facebook for my graduate school. Someone posted about a new publishing house accepting submissions for all kinds of writing. I figured, “Why not give it a chance? Worst they can say is no.” It was accepted and Neil from Tyburn Hill Media Co. helped me finish the book and edit it to perfection.
Neil and I tossed ideas back and forth for days on title ideas. It was originally titled "While I Was Single, Sorry Mom and Dad", but I told Neil when he accepted my submission that I did not like that title. It stayed that way until we neared the end of editing. Nothing we came up with felt like it worked. One day, Neil emailed me in all caps that he found a line from the book that can be reworked into the title. If They Can't Kiss Right: Surviving Online Dating was born.
Online dating: the new way of life. It seems like the only logical way to meet people anymore. The rest of our lives are on the internet, so why not our love lives too? Because if you wait for your friends to set you up, you’ll only be disappointed with their choice of Roger from accounting, the epitome of mouth breathing, booger eating morons.
Fortunately, there are no Rogers from accounting in this tale. There are, however, many other bad choices. But along the way, I learned what I want, and what I don’t want in a relationship. I learned good qualities to seek and bad qualities to leave behind. I also learned a lot about myself in the process, too. The biggest gain I got from my foray into online dating, though? Writing this book and passing along some of the life lessons I discovered through a painful trial-and-error process.
If you think your dating life is bad, take a gander at mine. Relive the awkward moments, soak in the unnecessary drama, and don’t forget to learn a thing or two. Men and women alike will be able to read this and take-home solid dating advice for the future.
Laugh. Learn. Love. Question why some humans are so insane. Maybe even see yourself in some of the pages. But above all, take to heart all the things I figured out along the way. It’ll save you the heartache and trouble. Trust me.
Shannon Yingst is a woman with dreams far beyond her reach. Not because she isn’t ambitious, but because she is short, and her dreams are on the high shelves. On her tip toes reaching for those dusty aspirations, she hopes to achieve the daunting task of entertaining the masses with the written word. Shannon likes to write while listening to Star Wars soundtracks, stand outside while it snows, and get confused playing board games. She would love to spend her days reading on the beach with a waiter bringing her frozen margaritas and snacks as the sun moves about the sky, but for now, she will continue to work at her desk in Jersey.
If They Can’t Kiss Right: Surviving Online Dating is her latest book.
You can visit her blog at https://waitstophelp.blogspot.com/ or connect with her on Twitter.
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